One of the most troubling ideas I’ve come across concerning the election is the idea that choosing one individual can “make liberals cry.” This is a tagline you often see to stories that demean the emotional reaction of people, an attack on “snowflakes.” An idea that expression of our grief is an unjustified reaction or somehow we are just poor losers.
The other night as my wife and I were watching The Way I See It, the documentary about President Obama’s chief white house photographer Pete Souza, it became very evident making us cry was easy. There was a point in the film that showed the President’s address to the country after the Sandy Hook tragedy and a behind the scenes snapshot of him meeting with the victim’s families. I could tell my wife was crying as I heard her sniffling, I knew tears were falling down my cheeks. I don’t know the number of times during that program where something would strike one of us and we would be weeping again. Was it really that easy to make liberals cry or just us?
After 2016 I did feel sick, there was a void in my soul that was unmistakable. Many of my friends had similar reactions, some did cry, others screamed, and others pushed harder into the things that drive them. Most of my emptiness at that time was more of a shock than it was a feeling of betrayal. I went into that night with great hope and desire to see the first woman become president. I went into that night with dreams of a progressive movement taking hold and continuing for years to come. I went into that night also anticipating that more people would reject the outright division cast by the eventual winner of that election. As the minutes passed and the inevitable became more real it just tore out a part of me. By the time the following morning arrived I had this sickness overtake me that was nearly impossible to shake.
Now, I see people that I know rejoicing in the possibility for this election to accomplish the same thing. Honestly, I don’t know if they actually like the guy or just like the idea that his reelection would “crush liberals.” I know it’s not the only thing fueling his base, but it is one of the central themes for many in this group and I find it very concerning.
I will never fully understand the idea of choosing a candidate out of spite for the other party. Any vote that I have ever cast was out of the hope for the betterment of everyone around me, including those that don’t align with that vote. A vote for President Obama was never about hurting his opposition. It was about my belief in him being the better choice for how I would like to see America move forward. A vote for Secretary Clinton was never out of animus for those on the other side of the political spectrum. It was a deep understanding of where the choice between two people could lead us. I just couldn’t fathom basing my decision on the idea of demoralizing a supporter of those I don’t agree with.
Where does this animosity lead to? Is it deep enough that we can’t reconcile our differences? Is it just a portion of people who would rather vote against the other side than to own that their insecurities are being played? Are these people hoping to harm the opposition? These are all questions that I can’t answer with certainty. I know there are people who would rather see division and hope for another civil war. I know there are people who will only vote for the (R) candidate. I know there are people who feel so disenfranchised that they feel everyone else deserves to be where they are. But, I can’t accept the idea that people are voting just to “make liberals cry.”
If you are voting based on policy, I can respect it even if we disagree. If you are voting based on party over person, I can understand. If you are voting because you feel your choice makes me cry, I have lost my faith in you as a human. And, I refuse to think that this is where America is heading. That rather than chose candidates that we feel best represent us, we chose candidates who are the greatest contrast to the other side. The presidential election is where we have always stayed away from this strategy. The strategy where a party chose a candidate that not only could unify the party, but also the country upon victory has always been the desired path. Democracy will not continue if we try to increasingly separate from one another. As political parties move further away from each other, people will do the same. We will be pushed further apart from the people in our communities that don’t fall into our alignment. At that point who is crying will be the least of our worries.
There are countless ways to see me cry if that is your desire. Show me The Way I See It again, I know it will happen. Play an episode of Grey’s Anatomy that dives into the step-by-step process of collecting a rape kit, I will cry my eyes out. Let me see an act of kindness that reaffirms my belief in humanity overcoming all obstacles, I’m sure tears will flow. Crying has never been an issue of mine. Emotional response is human reality. Admittedly crying doesn’t make me somehow less of a man or a weaker person. Time will only tell if this strategy of voting for the person that furthest opposes your rival party will work. Until then, I will still base my forthcoming vote on the hope for a better future for all Americans, even the ones who will vote just to make me cry.
Changed So Much! 